Baby Girl!

I would like to congratulate Rachel and Neil on the birth of their absolutely adorable little daughter, Madeline Charlotte Collins. Yes, Charlotte after me, because I am so great. Yes I am. She was born yesterday at 1.20pm, weighing 7lbs. And she is sooo cute. Although having looked after Isaac all day whilst Rach was in labour, I was a bit disappointed when she bought the baby home and I realised she couldn't really do anything yet. I mean, with Isaac he can play with toys, and run and jump and generally act stupid and its really funny to watch. And he laughs at me too and it's always nice to find someone on my 'level.' Having said that she was only 6 hours old, but still, you kind of forget how boring they are at that age. But what she lacks in fun she makes up for in cuteness.
Shock horror, she has brown hair! Not ginger (or red head for all you dumb Americans)like we all expected but brown. I wasn't quite sure if they bought the correct baby home...but she was tagged with the right name so I guess it was theirs. Almost doesn't seem like Rachel's baby if she isn't ginger.
She was still a bit dopey when I saw her, baby not rach, (rach seemed to have loads of energy, I have never seen someone look so good after giving birth only 6 hours earlier!) But I think Madeline was still in shock. It must be so weird being born. One day you are just sitting there, all comfy, possibly settling down for a nap, and then the next thing you are being pushed through a vagina and all these people you don't know are prodding and poking and staring at you. No wonder they are pretty quiet and docile the first few days, they're in shock!
Anyway, I'm sure she will liven up more than enough soon and they she will be more fun to play with.
Congratulations Neil and Rachel!
(I'll post a picture soon, but I hate this computer and it'll probably explode if I try to do anything different. Stupid Macs..)

Ill

I would like to thank my brother and my dad for infecting me with their lurgie, and at the worst possible time, Easter. So now I can't appreciate the full meaning of this holiday, chocolate, because I am sick. Thank you. I would also like to thank my brother for leaving his shoe on the stairs last night so I fell down them. Yes, once again thank you. I can't sit down. So kind of a crappy easter so far.

Fat Kids

There has been so much on the news recently about these obese kids, who eat nothing but junk food, don't exercise and and who can't walk because the sound of their thighs rubbing together hurts their ears. Ok maybe not the last bit, but it really is gross looking at them. Who lets their kids get into that state? These fat people go on chat shows and say they think they are sexy the way they are and why should they change to conform? Firstly, do they not have a mirror? Secondly, they will die! I don't think that we should all stop eating and become anorexic just to look like the impossibly perfect stars and models who are pushed in our faces everytime we open a magazine or turn on the TV. For most people this standard is impossible to acheive without resorting to surgery. But there is nothing wrong with just being healthy. I admit I need to lose weight and exercise more, but I am eating heathily and I do get out and walk a lot and weight is coming off.Its all to do with moderation. Treat yourself every so often, but don't eat McDonalds three times a day! I blame America. I know it is easy to blame them because in all truthfullness they are responsible for most of what is wrong with the world today... but they really have created a huge obesity problem in their own country and now are exporting it world wide. You walk into a Maccy D's in America and there are these hugely fat people ordering supersize triple burger meals. Do these people have no respect for themselves and their health? Not to mention their kids who are all eating the same crap.
However, we need to look closer to home and take some of the blame. Why do parents let their children eat food like sweets and crisps? Quick way to stop the problem...don't buy them! If they aren't sitting in the cupboard, the kids won't ask for them and you won't be tempted to give them any as a treat or to shut them up. It just doesn't make sense to me why parents buy sweets for their children in order to make them behave better or bribe them. Do they not realise that copious amounts of sugar will make them even behave even worse! It seems such a shame when kids as young as one or two are given chocolate and sweets that will be rotting their teeth and creating long term bad habits that will be get harder and harder to break. What is wrong with fruit or vegetables?
I was a fussy eater when I was a child and it is only in the last few years that I have started experimenting and eating vegetables, but I always ate loads of fruit and we never had chocolate or fizzy drinks or crisps when we were young. I remember going to school with a packed lunch and being jealous that all the other children had sweets, chocolates and coke for lunch, and I had brown bread sandwiches and fruit, with low sugar orange squash. But you know what, I am so grateful to my mum for that now.
I am supporting the Feed Me Better Campaign which is collecting signatures for their petition to make school dinners more healthy. They want to ban junk food and make dinners more nutritious. I think that if the kids aren't getting taught healthy eating at home then at least they are given a chance at school, and maybe they can then educate their parents. You can sign this petition and learn more about this here: http://www.feedmebetter.com

Brainiac

Once more my slothfullness (yes, it is a word) has reached new levels, after not writing all week. I could use the excuse of being traumatised by my recent burglary, or that I have been really busy with work, but I am going to give you more credit than that. There is no excuse apart from sheer laziness. Once or twice I have planned blogs in my head on the long journey home from work, but then I get in and decide that it is just too much hassle to turn the computer on and I lose valuable TV time. In my defence the computer is really slow and doesn't seem to like blogger, once or twice deleting whole blogs rather than publishing, but if I was dedicated little things like that shouldn't stop me. So this weekend I have decided to make it up, and I will attempt to post as many blogs as I can create. Obviously trying not to sacrifice quality for quantity, but lets face it, there isn't much quality going on anyway!
This week I have been trying not to freak out about my exam. The work seemed to be getting harder, but on thursday I made a breakthrough. I mastered foreign exchange. I remembered how to work out the eqations and rearrange them, which may sound easy to some people but is a real trial for me. My brain just doesn't work that way. I can master history and english and pretty useless subjects like that, but maths really isn't my strong point! Maybe its because I'm left handed. I'm sure I read somewhere that left handed people are better at that arts rather than the logical subjects. Something to think about...
So work seems to be picking up a bit, things are making that little bit more sense, although I still get that nasty churning feeling in my stomach when I think about sitting the exam and how little time is left to study. I don't think I have ever put this much time and effort into studying for an exam. How the hell did I pass my degree with so little work? Is it down to the fact that my brain is unused to work after spending so long in a job that required very little thinking? Or it is due to me just generally getting dumber? Or is it the subject matter? I am finding that things I thought I had forgotten years ago are still in my brain, they had just been hiding for a while. I found myself thinking in french the other day and being able to form sentances and use words that I had completely forgotten about years ago. I started talking about random dates and facts from American history at the dinner table, and I knew I was right and not just bullshitting like usual. This leads me to think that maybe me studying again is waking up my brain after a year or so of nothing. And this then makes me realise that after I finish this course I really don't want to become stupid again. So maybe I will do some more course. I could brush up on history, and english literature. The idea to do it is all there, but we will see...knowing me I will probably get the brochures, and then put them aside, aiming to do it later, and it will never happen. But at least the thought is there...

Sickening

There seems to be a bug going round. Dad and Studle have been throwing up for the last couple of days. At first I thought Dad was just drunk, so I bitched about it, and offered no sympathy, but then I realised he was actually ill, which kinda made me feel bad. Still, I was pissed off that when I asked if he was ok, he replied asking if I could get him a glass of water. OK, I felt bad, but I wasn't offering to get him anything, I was just being polite. I really am selfish....
As I write this Studle is making retching noises in the bathroom. I don't know if it is just becuse I can hear this, or if it is because I am catching this, but I do not feel well. My stomach is churning and I am hot and cold. Please don't let me catch this. I can give a man a run for the money when it comes to overeacting to being ill. I have big plans for studying this weekend, and I really do not need them messed up by being sick!

Scum of the Earth

Two nights ago I had this horrible dream where my car was broken in to. Glass was everywhere and my stereo and cds were stolen. Ironically this morning that nightmare came true. Some scum of the earth decided to pick my car to burgle last night. Not only that but they had the cheek to do this right under my bedroom window, which was open, and yet I didn't hear anything. Two doors along, same thing. They picked the two oldest cars on our street and smashed them up, and stole stereos. Fuckers. What kind of person can do this. The worst thing is that living in such a small town, chances are I probably know these people and they are laughing at me behind my back. Never before have I been more convinced that corporal punishment is the way forward. Try stealing with one hand. Not so easy huh? Although in my opinion, I'd like their testicles cut off.
How can people like that live with themselves. I have to take a day off work, clear up broken glass, contact the insurance and police, and to tell the truth I am feeling really shaken up. And these people are getting off scott free with the money to fund their drug habit no doubt.
As usual the police were SO much help. Wait, scratch that, maybe not. They won't even come round to look at the car or take fingerprints. All they said was to take a crime number and claim off insurance. Yeah, so helpful. I'll get on to that while these scum are still roaming the streets with no chance of being caught. The police are so busy stopping motorists for speeding or for talking on their mobile phones that they don't have time to investigate actual crimes. Keep up the good job guys! I'm really really impressed. (Note sarcasm)
So, my car can't be fixed until tomorrow, the window is all smashed, and it has to sit outside my house again tonight. Fab! Maybe the scum will come back and finish the job and steal the car! It's not like they will be caught or punished, so why not!
So back to clearing the glass off the road and out of my car. Fantastic.

Sooooo boring

I am being bitched at by Michaela to go out tonight. I know I am being lame and boring by not going out, but I'm just not feeling the going out vibe at the moment. All day I have been back and forth contemplating it, one minute I will think, yeah, ok, I'll go, the next, I am remembering just how crappy the bars and majority of the people in Hunstanton are and I change my mind. I think I am giving this way too much consideration. I know I should go because I haven't seen anyone recently. I work, come home, sleep and that is pretty much my whole week. Apart from Thurdays, when I have Beavers. Yes, I am a BEAVER leader. And yes, I have heard all the usual shitty jokes. Its been 7 years now, seriously, its getting old! Anyway, back to the problem. I could go out, see some people, go to a scanky bar, get wasted and then feel rough all day tomorrow. But at least I would have done something with my evening. I watched part of a terrible movie today about some girl dying of cancer, and it kind of made me think, I should make the most of things. But then I got bored of that thought and turned over to watch You've Been Framed instead. You just can't beat watching bad things happen other people. Never fails to cheer me up!
So I am still undecided about tonight. Chances are I will dither on and on, and then the evening will be over anyway. But at least I know I will get stuff done tomorrow rather than spend the day nursing a hangover. And tomorrow I have big plans! Studying, taking Isaac to Sandringham for a walk, yes, two things in one day! Wow, I really have ambition!

Thank God It's Friday

This week has been HELL. I am so glad its friday and there is NO work tomorrow. No getting up at some god awful hour and no 2 hour drive to work. I am going to sleep in for as long as possible.
My computer has packed up again, all together now. awww.. So I am using my borthers computer to write this, and it takes forever to open each page, yes I've found a computer worse than mine! So I won't be writing much today partly because of that but mostly because the Simpsons has just started. And lets face it, the Simpsons rule.
Well it's 9pm and I'm going to bed with the Simpsons. Yes, I suck. This job has ruined my social life. Goodnight

Nice work if you can get it

Work is kind of a breeze at the moment. We have a hell of a lot of studying to do but we don't have to do any real work yet. Which is nice. And it's also kind of cool that we have a real laugh doing it. James and I make the worst study partners. It all started out so well, we didn't really know each other so we were both polite and relatively quiet and just got on with our work. Two weeks later and we end up spending the day having the most random conversations about anything and everything. It's nice that I have got to know people on my 'team' quite well but its also a nightmare for getting work done. Todays topics for conversation were; water and surface tension, graveyards, the best way to die and magpies. We have adopted the superstition about seeing two magpies and being a sign of good luck, but seeing one is a bad omen. I think there is something in this. I saw one on the way to work, was looking out so hard for the second that I nearly crashed, which would have been ironic, and then my stupid car broke down twice! All before 8am. Damn. However, this afternoon I saw two and then my car made it home without a problem! Freaky huh?
Anyway, back to the work issue. I still have a month until my exam but it is all so overwhelming. Wait, a month today! I HATE FINANCIAL MATHS and STUPID FORMULAS. I really don't understand anything about maths in the slightest. This morning I was starting to panic about this. I have even been waking up at night having been dreaming about the formula for compound interest. Big relief when I was told it wasn't a huge part of the exam. However, I still think they might not realise just how worthless I am with this subject. And because I am worrying about this I am avoiding doing any maths like the plague. BTW. Is it true you could catch the plague from the handrails on the underground? I'm sure I read this somewhere, and I need to settle an argument. I don't think I dreamt it....

St Patricks Day

Top of de morning to ya! Happy St Patricks Day to all the Irish out there. A perfect excuse to get drunk, drink Guinness, wear green things, eat green food and be rowdy. Unfortunately I will NOT be celebrating this year. Sigh. Yes, I will be in bed by 9 ready for another early start tomorrow. Aw, goodbye my social life. But I have been humming Oh Danny Boy all day, earning myself a few strange looks, all in your honour. Please accept this as an apology for being a total loser and missing out on the festivities.

Drunken Pervy Men

I went out on our 'team social' last night with work. Oh My God, what a nightmare! I think I am really lucky with my team at work. I get on really well with most of them, there is just that one person who drives everyone crazy!! It would be him who organised the team social. He emailed us all daily for the past few weeks, keeping records of all the emails, etc. Hassling us hourly about ALL the miniscule details. But we all made the effort to turn up, and went to the restaurant. We met the other people here who were joining us, a few managers, and some people from other teams. At this point me and jen were elbowed out of the way to this guy could sit near the rest of our team and we were relegated to the other end of the table with the old people. Who were for the record very nice, but we didn't know them and spent the whole meal making mindless small talk to keep the conversation going. Anyway, I dropped jen home and went to the bar to meet them. This guy turns out to be one of those annoying, pervy drunks, who gets louder, more arrogant, and objectionable the more he drinks. By the way, what straight men actually drink Blue WKD all night? I kept expecting him to ask for a woo woo, or an archers and lemonade or some other girly crap. At this point I realised that I REALLY didn't want to be standing next to him and his wondering hands, so I kept edging further and further away. Seriously, imagine a drunk, boorish pervy, middleaged business man and you will have an image of what this man is like! Apart from the fact that he is 23. But he could not take the hint, so I left. The night pretty much sucked anyway and the drunken advances of a knob head didn't exactly fill me with joy. Then all night I get texts from him and his mate asking why I left, in his words he thought I was 'up for it, what happened?' At which point did he think I was 'up for it?!' Can one person seriously be that deluded? I was rude to him, snapped at him, moved away from him whenever he got near, got people to stand around me so he couldn't get close. But no, I was 'up for it' according to him. Jesus.
So it really wasn't a great night, but I did learn one thing, that I will NOT be doing 'team socials' again, apart from our friday lunchtime pub session which so far we have kept secret from this guy...

Funerals

The drive to work in the morning has been getting increasingly tedious so I tend to find my mind wondering onto obscure subjects. Yesterday morning was funerals. I decided that seeing as there is no guarentee that I will be getting married, but I will definately be having a funeral I should stop picking which song I would like played at my wedding, which by the way would be Dixie Chicks 'White Trash Wedding' and concentrate on what song I would like at my funeral. I have decided that I would want to make people enjoy it rather than being sad. Obviously people would be completely distraught as they would have lost one of the greatest people EVER, so I would need to cheer them up. So my funeral song is going to be......Ghostbusters. Imagine the scene, everyone is sitting there, crying, they are asked to rise and open their song books, and the music to ghostbusters comes on. 'If there's something strange in the neighbourhood...' That would be pretty cool.

Kate

So I was browsing the internet on my 'work from home day' and I found the Kate Garrett Band. Wow, I mean I know Kate is pretty cool, but to have her own band? Shit. http://www.thekategarrettband.com/

Work From Home Day

Today I had my first ever 'work from home day.' I got to get up late, watch crappy daytime TV, nap whilst watching the aforesaid crappy daytime TV, and then maybe at some point I might do some work. Although in all truthfullness I probably wont. Chances are I will probably play on the internet for a while, then watch a DVD this afternoon and then TV all night. At some point my eyes will be so strained from watching endless hours of TV that I will drift off to sleep. Although this sounds like fun I wont have achieved anything all day and by tonight it will be playing on my mind that I have wasted an entire day doing nothing, watching pretty worthless TV and napping. Days like this always seem to make me more tired so when I get up tomorrow I will be even more tired than if I hadn't had the day off. One thing I have achieved today is taking my car to the garage...again. Yes, it's in its second home once again. This time the list is pretty extensive, lights, electrics, fanbelt, plugs, windscreen washer and brakes. Fab huh? At least it will stop the police pulling me over for no back lights. And me pulling the whole innocent, stupid female act, which I must admit I have mastered pretty well, to the point that they now offer to help fix them.
Anyway, back to work tomorrow and I wont have achieved anything in my studying apart from pushing all the knowledge I do have out of my head, and replacing it with storylines from soaps. Oops.

Mother's Day

Today is Mother's Day. I admit my present was a bit lame this year. I looked all around Hunstanton yesterday. OK, its not exactly a great place to buy a present, but I had left it to the last minute. All the shops had these cheesy cards with bears and flowers on them, and there is no way I am buying that crap. They also did little boxes of chocolate with corny messages on them. So I wasn't going to insult my mum by buying stuff like that. So I bought her a toaster. Yes, it seemed like a good idea. We had a little old one that didn't match anything in the kitchen,so I bought a big, matching one, with nifty little gadgets. Once I got home I thought about the significance of this present and it didn't seem like such a great idea. This woman cooks, cleans and runs around after us all year long, and on her one special day, I buy her a kitchen appliance. And she doesn't even eat toast. So I went out again and bought her some toiletries to go with it. Still a pretty lame present. Oh well. She knows I meant well. And she even had the decency to look happy about it. I might go out now and buy here something else. I am beginning to feel a bit guilty. Anyway, thanks for everything mum.

Bad Behaviour

Don't you hate it when people you think you know pretty well turn out to be complete dicks. When their real personalities come out. Its such a let down because you realise then that you don't actually know these people and you see them in a whole other light. And not a particularly favourable one. I've seen this happen to somebody recently, and there really is nothing worse than losing respect for someone because its not an easy thing to gain back. It makes you think about your own actions, and if anything good is going to come from this dickish behaviour it is that you know that you will never act in that way. So in a way it makes you look like a better person. Which is always a good thing. Its like when you stand next to a fat person so you look slimmer, this time you stand near someone acting like a prick and at least you look better for it. Whilst they are making a fool of themselves you can have some dignity and look really good. So maybe it isn't such a bad thing after all..

Lobster Sticks to Magnet

I read Stacy's blog the other day, http://tenpoundsofchocolate.blogspot.com/ and it reminded me of my time at Union. When I actually went to school there, not when I was just on a constant 'holiday.' I admit I had forgotten just how much fun we had that term. One of the best bits, although watching now I am not sure why we were so hooked on it, had to be Lobster Magnet. Check it out. http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/lobster.php
I watched it again the other day and I did find it pretty funny, but I think that was because it reminded me of other things. Stacy running up and down the hallway yelling, 'left claw north, right claw south, rah rah rah.' Having listened to it again just now I know that tune will be in my head for the rest of the day. Damn. Well its better than Thomas the Tank which I hummed to myself for the last 2 days. ( I blame Hamleys). At least people wont recognise this song. Anyway, I also had this thing for the Winnie the Pooh satan thing that Losure had on his computer. It wasn't quite Lobster Magnet, but there is always something cool about seeing favourite children's characters turn into evil, satan worshipping, possessed zombies. I'm pretty sure Losure got sick of me asking to watch it again and again, which might explain why he suddenly 'lost it' on his computer. Hmmm.
I miss those days.

SNOW DAY!!!

Snow day! Snow Day! Snow Day!! Yay!!!
I have just spent the whole day in bed because I got to have a snow day today! Yes, England has snow! HAHAHAHA.
I got up this morning, started out for work, did 15 miles in an hour, and decided to come back and forget it. So I got to sleep. Something I have been severely lacking recently.
Only down side to the day is that I didn't get to ogle shamelessly over the cute guy at work. Oh well, there's always Monday...